Missing You

When this summer started, I wasn't expecting to miss you. I didn't even know what was happening with you and me. I didn't know if it was going to be anything. You had touched my arm under a blanket, that was it. We had been drinking, so in my head, nothing was clear. As the summer progressed it became clear there was more than just alcohol behind this action. Eventually it came out that I liked you and you liked me. What was that emotion? What was I feeling? I was still confused and now scared. You see, its tricky letting people into your life. Its scary and makes things complicated. But I did it anyways. I made trips to the city. To see you, to see my friends, to see sweet lady New York. As the summer went on things seemed to get more serious, more complicated. We skyped and talked on the phone, for hours. Learning about each other, talking about our lives, getting to know one another. I started to like you more and more. But I never had the chance to miss you. I'd never really had you, you can't miss something you've never had. Then, I finally got to hang out with you, really hang out with you. All the talking, all the nights of no sleep from phone calls and skype sessions turned into nights of no sleep because of other things. And then I left again. I left to go home to the obligations I left behind for one short week. And now I know what it is to miss you. I know what it is to be apart from someone you like, someone you call your girlfriend. And what a weighty word that is, it seems. I am sad now, because in a week, when I return to my friends and my sweet lady, I won't get to return to you. I will still be missing you. And right now there is nothing anyone can do about that. Right now this waiting, this thought of when I'll get to see you next, seems endless. I'm sick of missing people. I'm sick of missing you.